Also known as graduated extinction, ‘Ferberizing’ teaches your child to self-soothe and fall asleep on their own

When you have an infant at home, sleep can feel like a far-off fantasy. Will your little one ever learn to fall asleep on their own, without your constant soothing and shushing? Will you ever get to sleep through the night again?

If you’re looking into sleep training methods, you’ve probably come across the Ferber method, a popular technique for helping babies learn to fall asleep by themselves. But how exactly does it work, and should you try it?

Pediatrician Noah Schwartz, MD, explains the ins and outs of the Ferber method and how it can help babies learn to self-soothe and thus, sleep better.

What is the Ferber method?

The Ferber method is a sleep training method made popular in 1985 by Richard Ferber, MD. Like other methods, the goal is to teach babies to fall asleep independently, both at bedtime and if they wake up in the middle of the night.

The Ferber method is the most well-known type of “graduated extinction,” the scientific name for gradually training an infant not to associate sleep with the presence of their caregiver. You might also hear it called:

  • Controlled crying
  • Progressive waiting
  • The interval method
  • The check-and-console method

“The goal is to get your baby to learn to self-soothe, which means they can put themselves to sleep without another person intervening or assisting the entire time,” Dr. Schwartz explains.

So, what does “Ferberizing” your baby entail?

When your baby is getting sleepy, you’ll lay them down in their crib, offer a soothing goodnight and then, leave the room. Even if they cry, the idea is not to check on them until a set amount of time has passed. You'll return to the room at designated intervals to check on them and help soothe them. And these intervals get longer with each passing night.

“In time, the intervals become longer between check-ins,” Dr. Schwartz further explains. “You start pushing things out a little bit more as your baby learns to self-soothe.”

A step-by-step guide to the Ferber method

Let’s get one thing out of the way up front: As with the cry-it-out method, your baby is almost certainly going to cry when you leave the room, at least, at first. And you’re going to have to train yourself not to immediately respond to those cries — which can be really, really tough.

“The Ferber method is essentially the cry-it-out method but with check-ins,” Dr. Schwartz clarifies. But for caregivers who feel that the cry-it-out method is too strict or difficult (either for them or their baby or both), the Ferber method can offer a more manageable in-between option.

Here’s how to follow the Ferber method of sleep training your baby:

  1. Do your bedtime routine.Develop and stick to a bedtime routine to help your baby understand that bedtime is coming. “Providing them with a consistent schedule every night helps prime them to understand that it’s time for sleep,” Dr. Schwartz says.
  2. Put baby to sleep and quietly leave the room. After you’ve said your goodnights, it’s time to slip out of the room. Though they may cry, you shouldn’t check on them until it’s time for your first set check-in. Follow the suggested Ferber method schedule (farther down in this article) or a modified one you’ve created ahead of time.
  3. Wait for your first check-in.Set a timer to tell you when it’s time to go back into your baby’s room. This initial waiting period gets longer with each passing night (the first time, you’ll wait just three minutes before checking in; the second night, you’ll wait five minutes; and so on).
  4. Check on your baby.Return to their room in stealth mode and leave the lights off to avoid stimulation. “If the baby is still crying, you’re not supposed to pick them up, but you can provide verbal comfort, like shushing them or talking quietly to them,” Dr. Schwartz suggests. But don’t stay for too long.
  5. Leave the room and wait again. Once you’ve made a quick, quiet exit, you’ll wait for your second check-in, per whatever pre-set schedule you’re using. This check-in should come after a slightly longer wait than the first interval.
  6. Do check-in No. 2.Slip back into baby’s room for your second check-in, again talking in soothing tones and keeping stimulation to a minimum. “During each check-in, you’re providing your child with a little bit of reassurance that you’re still there for them,” Dr. Schwartz says. Hopefully, they’ll calm down and begin drifting to sleep — but even if they don’t, you still shouldn’t linger long.
  7. Repeat as needed throughout the night.The amount of time between your second and third check-ins (if you need them) will extend a little bit longer. Continue the process until your baby falls asleep.

The next night, you’ll move on to a new schedule, which extends each of those intervals by a few more minutes.

When you do check in on your baby, Dr. Schwartz says that it can be helpful to give them words of encouragement, even though they’re too young to understand them.

“I actually encourage families to say things like, ‘Mommy’s here, Daddy’s here,’ and ‘You’re doing such a good job. Just keep trying to go to sleep,’” he illustrates, “because just hearing your voice is very soothing for them.”

Suggested Ferber method schedule

In his book Your Child’s Sleep Problems, Dr. Ferber shares timeframes for checking on your baby, with intervals that get slightly longer each day.

If these intervals don’t suit you, that’s OK. Dr. Ferber acknowledges that families might need to adapt these timeframes — and Dr. Schwartz agrees.

“Some people do 10-minute intervals, then 20 minutes, then 30 minutes,” he notes. “Whatever you decide on, the idea is that the intervals should become longer between check-ins.”

Is the Ferber method harmful for my child?

A 2016 study found that the graduated extinction method didn’t bring on any adverse stress responses and had no long-term effects on kids. In fact, their research showed that infants who learned to self-soothe through sleep training methods like this one eventually fell asleep 15 minutes faster than children who didn’t use sleep training methods.

“Letting your child learn to work things out on their own can be really helpful to them,” Dr. Schwartz shares.

“Instead of them crying every time they need to grab a toy, for example, they start to learn that they can do it themselves. It gives them the tools to start figuring out how to navigate the world around them, even at such a young age.”